Friday, November 15, 2013


 I've written this post about 800 times and have deleted it so many more. Do you ever this issue? If I can be real, and I try to be on here because this in my little nook in the world, shit has hit the fan this week and I'm broken. I never said I had it together, I never meant to give you a false impression if you've thought that because I don't have it together.

My life journey over the past three years has not been easy. It has been one road block after another and some days you get tired of picking yourself up to keep fighting an upward battle.

The past 3 months have been some of the hardest months in my life. I'm trying to recover from a running injury, which can take over a year (PF). My body has been completely whacked out. I have "incidents" which has led to several medication changes and Friday, the wind completely knocked me out.

I started seeing a new Dr. after feeling like my neuro wasn't answering the tough questions. After feeling like every time I went into his office, he kept blowing me off or wouldn't consider the idea that hormones played a role in my seizures. After many tearful visits home, lots of frustration, phone calls in tears with friends and unanswered questions, encouragement from my friends and a fed up husband, I made an appointment three months ago to see an Eplieptologist who specializes in Epilepsy.

I learned more from him in 45 mins then I did in three years. This Dr. was AMAZING and awesome. I felt relief that someone all these years understood my language, got who I was and believed the same way that I did about my seizures..
And then he began to tell me..

He thought they were in a completely different part of my brain..

He suggested as professionally as possible, I wasn't treated incorrectly for the type he thought I had.. And that in order to confirm his belief about my seizures, I will go through a series of tests to get more insight.

Medication was changed.
If they are where he thinks they might be, I could be a candidate for brain surgery. 

And this stuff is real!

It's my life. While reality has hit like a ton of bricks, I'm hoping we are on the right track to getting this resolved..

All week I've been dreading this post, but I needed to get it out there and move forward.

Q: what's the hardest reality you've ever had to face?


Britt said...

Wow Sarah this is exciting and scary!!! I will be praying for you as you deal with this!! I'll pray God through surgery if that's what is necessary, will heal you completely!!

P.S. I have a blog that is separate from my regular blog that is only for me. No one dare ever read the words written there... they're too deep, to hard.

Two Runners Travel said...

You were very brave to write this post Sarah. I wish you luck in finding the answers to handle all the issues you are dealing with. Hugs!

Susan P said...

My dearest Sarah - I am so excited that you might finally be getting the right answers! Yay for God leading you to this new Dr.
Take one step at a time and don't worry about surgery until it's a guarantee to happen. I have had heart surgery and can tell you it's not as scary as you think when you know your whole life is in God's hand. :) He doesn't make mistakes!!

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